Before you start reading this, do me a favor and grab a pen and a piece of paper. Better yet, if you are with someone have them join you and close their eyes while you read this aloud.
(Waiting...)
Ready?
Now continue reading.
There are large cracks in the foundation of this great country of ours that have existed for quite some time. The kind of cracks that can bring the entire house down if left untreated. In fact, it has caused the wooden frame that sits on top of the foundation to become uneven and smelly from the mold that has grown over time.
Draw a square representing the foundation and frame. Keep your pen on the paper and read on.
It’s not just the foundation that has been in trouble. The roof also has had a large hole in it. Not surprising. It has been ignored for so long. On days of sunshine, you may actually enjoy having an unintended skylight. On days of rain, it’s a nuisance but nothing a few pots and a bucket can’t handle. On days of down-pouring rain, like it is today, there aren’t enough buckets in the house to catch all the water.
Draw a triangle on top of the square representing the roof. Keep your pen on the paper and read on.
And those windows. Lord have mercy. There’s a lot of muck, gnats, mosquitos, fingerprints — all things that block your view of what’s happening in your own front yard.
Without lifting your pen from the paper, draw a window inside the square to the left.
The front door of your house is used to welcome in friends and family. Unfortunately, your door is heavy and often jams. You have to use both hands to open it and your hip to close it shut. Because of the labor required, you don’t just open the door for anyone — only the select few.
Draw a door inside the square to the right of the window.
After you yank the door open, you immediately see the large oak tree that has been a source of shade for your house. The oak tree is old, and it has very deep roots. Roots so deep and long you now know the source of your foundation cracks.
Draw a tree outside the square to the right.
Before you go back inside you notice a young man surrounded by a group of other kids outside to the left. They look to be playing some sort of game. You smile and go back inside your house.
Later that evening, you find out that was no game at all. In fact, it was a young man who was being harassed, pushed, punched, and kicked. You wonder how you missed it. Could it be because you “don’t see color” you didn’t notice he was black?
Draw that young man to the left of your square.
I want you to think about the crack in the foundation caused by the deep roots in the tree.
The hole in the roof from years of wear and tear.
The nasty window, the hard to open door and the young black man you didn’t even notice or maybe turned a blind eye to.
I can pretty much guarantee the house you drew looks like the work of a two year-old. It should. Most of us are not artists.
I’ll even go so far as to say your house is a mess.
But it’s your mess.
It’s my mess.
It’s our mess.
One last thing that I need you to do.
In the middle of your page, sign your name.
Whenever you sign your name to something it signifies ownership. We each need to own our messy houses as we all have work to do to repair it.
These days I cannot think of a more uncomfortable conversation than the topic of race. Whether it is the fear of saying the wrong thing, the not knowing how to start the dialogue or the realization of our own role in perpetuating the status quo — this discussion has left many of us looking for answers and long overdue action.
As uncomfortable as it is to hear, these answers start at our own doorstep. There is this saying, ‘’get your house in order’’. So, let’s start getting our collective houses in order.
1. If you see something, say something. May be easier said than done. But we have let off color and blatantly disgraceful comments go unchecked. We each have the individual power to speak up on racial issues that are swarming around and in our house.
2. If you see nothing, say something. What does that look like? If you are sitting on a zoom call and see faces that look like yours call it out. We should embrace our difference as a differentiator.
3. Get uncomfy. Frame your picture you just drew. Post it where your family and friends who can see it. Talk about it. While you’re at it take a picture of your picture and tweet, Facebook, Instagram it, add #curehatetpc and tag us at the_pinkcouch.
4. Be your brother’s keeper. This is for my black and brown brothers and sisters. Am I my brother’s keeper? Not just our black brothers. Not just our brown sisters. Most of my life I’ve heard many say it is not our job to educate our white brothers and sisters about race. I’m going to challenge us to take the time to actually have the conversation. We cannot complain about ignorance if we are not willing to teach.
As we repair each of our houses, we will start to see the community of houses improve. As the community improves, there is an increase in value. As there is an increase in value, well, maybe we will begin to see the occupants as valuable.
